3 Secrets to Attract Your Perfect Twin Flame Relationship

How I Went From Singledom and a String of Failed Relationships to Attracting My Twin Flame

At the risk of sounding like a Debbie Downer, let me just get this out of the way now: until I met my husband, Brendon, my love life had been either non-existent or full of disappointments. I can go on and on about why that was — unrealistic expectations about men and relationships, not having healed and processed emotional wounds within myself, not loving myself enough, blah, blah, blah — but, you’re not here for that. You’re here to find your twin flame!

I only bring that up to share that if I can meet my twin flame, there is absolutely no reason why you can’t either. I was not a master guru on relationships or love, but I did have an earnest desire in my heart to be with someone who would meet me on all levels: spiritually, emotionally, and physically.

Now, this is when it’s my moral obligation to share that you’re only in control of yourself; the rest is up to the big man or woman upstairs. That means that there is a substantial part of the attraction process that is up to the universe and is out of your hands. There are destinies to be fulfilled, karmas to be resolved, and other spiritual milestones to be met. So, no process or willful action will change that. If it’s meant for you, it’ll come. If it’s not, it won’t.

Well, this all sounds well and good, but tell me how to attract my twin flame already!

Alright then, let’s get into the nitty-gritty.

Photo by Nicholas Gercken

What Is a Twin Flame?

It’s believed that at the creation of your soul, it split into two so that each aspect could live life on earth and learn spiritual lessons and gifts. Then, when each aspect is spiritually awake, they can reunite and be in a relationship again. However, this doesn’t always happen. For example, one twin flame might meet his/her other half only to be repelled by him/her and separate again until the other half develops their awareness a bit more. This can take years or lifetimes depending on the individual.

Like I mentioned earlier, you can’t force or will your twin flame into your life. Not only is that mostly up to the universe, but it’s also up to your twin flame, wherever he or she is. They have their work cut out for them too; they need to emotionally and energetically prepare themselves for meeting your radiant soul!

You’re one worthy beast, so this part can’t be underestimated or rushed.

This might even take lifetimes. Don’t fret over that; if you don’t reunite with your twin flame in this life, it doesn’t mean that you’re sentenced to a loveless life with no partner. No way! You still have soul mates (everyone on earth does), which are different from a twin flame, and can actually be easier and more enjoyable than a twin flame relationship. Twin flame relationships aren’t necessarily a walk in the park.

The Difference Between a Soul Mate and a Twin Flame

Every human on the planet has at least one soul mate, if not many more. Soul mates play different roles in our lives, not just romantic roles. They can be an influential teacher that profoundly changes your life, or a family member that you’ve always had an inexplicably special relationship with (more than your other family members). It can be a best friend, a co-worker, or a romantic partner. Like the saying goes, soul mates come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

On the other hand, every human only has one twin flame because he/she is literally your other half. You may or may not meet him or her in this life, but you can bet on meeting at least one (if not many more) of your soul mates. Being in a soul mate relationship is much more common than being in a twin flame relationship.

With both soul mates and twin flames, they might invoke your wounds or your strengths, depending on what your soul is wanting to learn at that point in your life. Hollywood movies portray soul mates as always making the protagonist feel incredible and fulfilled having met them. While that certainly can happen in real life, your twin flame and your soul mates might bring out the very worst in you so you can process it and heal. This is especially true if you both have a lot of emotional baggage to release.

Photo by Tony Ross

3 Secrets to Attracting Your Twin Flame

01  Prepare Yourself Energetically and Emotionally

Attracting the relationship of your dreams starts with YOU. Develop your self-awareness and go deep within yourself to process conscious and unconscious emotional wounds and limiting beliefs you have inherited from society, family, your lineage, and your past. This is the “junk” or emotional baggage you’re carrying.

This can look like a lot of different things: you don’t trust people; you have a closed heart; you have feelings of unworthiness or low self-esteem; you don’t have healthy boundaries, you haven’t forgiven yourself or someone else about something from the past, etc. Only you will know what that is for you.

Don’t skip this step as this is what will lay the energetic foundation to attract your twin flame. In fact, you have no choice. Not doing this means that even if you were to meet your twin flame, they will leave until you’re ready.

Take your time with this as it’s a deeply personal and tender process.

There are many tools that can support you in that process, such as meditation, quiet reflection, energy healing, becoming aware of when you get triggered and why, and reading spiritual and thought-provoking books are some that come to mind.

02  Make the Intention to Meet Your Twin Flame

At some point, you’ll want to make a call to the universe that you want to meet your twin flame. While the universe is always reading your vibration and knows what your heart’s true desires are, becoming consciously aware of it yourself and verbally affirming it gives your wish that extra energetic ‘oomph.’ You can do this through prayer, saying it out loud, writing it in your journal, or anything else that will make it concrete for you. Ask that this person mirrors you in all ways.

I also said a heartfelt prayer to my potential twin flame that I wanted to be with him and that I was ready to do so. I told him energetically that I will wait for him until he’s ready and its the right time. I was really moved at the end of it because I could feel in my heart that his soul had received the message on some level.

At that point, I knew that the rest was up to the universe.

03  Let it Go Completely

As with anything that you want to manifest, you only get it when you stop yearning for it. This was, by far, the hardest step for me, and I believe part of the reason why it took so long for me to receive the relationship.

I kept looking at every man as my potential soul mate and felt lonely in the process. Ironically, Brendon showed up in my life 2 weeks after I broke up with my ex-boyfriend and had completely sworn off love for the rest of my life. I moved to an extremely rural, and remote town to avoid relationships, put my head down, and distract myself with work. Once I gave up, he came.

Fully and truly release control of when and how it’ll happen; just trust that the universe has your back and get on with your life thinking and doing other things. This MUST be done vibrationally — not just through your words. You can’t fool the universe.

This is How You’ll Know When You’ve Met Your Twin Flame

“I’m going to Brazil to see John of God,” Brendon said.

Every cell in my body internally screamed a resounding, “I WANT TO COME!!!”

Mind you, Brendon wasn’t inviting me to go to Brazil with him. So, I was shocked at my soul’s involuntary and visceral response to his words. This was when I just knew that wherever he was, I needed to be with him.

Brendon + I in Brazil

There was no fanfare or telenovella drama about it. It was more of an energetic and physical magnetic pull to be with him.

It will feel as clear and natural as your body knowing when it’s full or when you’re sleepy.

When you’re both ready, your twin flame will find you NO MATTER WHAT. Take it from me; I met mine in the middle of the most remote area in the Outback of Australia in a town of about 1,500 people. As the predominant values of the locals were guns and pig hunting, it was the last place I’d expect to meet a spiritually awake person like Brendon. And yet, there he was in all his glory.

Soon after that, he did invite me to Brazil as we quickly moved into a relationship. To this day, what amazes me about the whole situation is how effortless and precise meeting Brendon was.

Divine orchestration was 100% at play.

In the past, being in relationships (or trying to be in them) was like a mind game. I analyzed every action and word said. I agonized if it didn’t look the way I wanted it to. They often felt breathless and impatient…like hurried passion. The flame burned bright, but quickly dimmed.

But, with Brendon, it felt like the most natural thing in the world to be with him, as if I was coming home. There was no striving whatsoever. It’s not to say that we don’t have our moments of arguing and disagreements; the difference is that there is a strong foundation of unconditional love to support us.

Twin flames reunited

I hope these tips helped you. Happy manifesting! xoxo

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Written by:


Written by:


Christine is an intuitive empath, clairsentient, indigo adult, Reiki Master, EMF Balancing Technique® Practitioner and all-around free spirit. She has traveled to nearly 35 countries exploring different ways of life and developing her spirituality. She specializes in giving energy healing sessions and intuitive readings for people and pets.


Christine is an intuitive empath, clairsentient, indigo adult, Reiki Master, EMF Balancing Technique® Practitioner and all-around free spirit. She has traveled to nearly 35 countries exploring different ways of life and developing her spirituality. She specializes in giving energy healing sessions and intuitive readings for people and pets.

  1. Stephanie says:

    Such a great piece! Appreciate you writing this. You’ve helped me tremendously.